What exactly in Narcissistic Abuse?
Narcissistic Abuse is one of the most common and least acknowledged forms of abuse which without fail has a severe impact on the survivor's health and quality of life.
Being involved with a Narcissist is nothing like a normal relationship, neither is the breakup. Time will heal all wounds doesn't apply. And no, you cannot just snap out of it, get over it and move on.
Narcissistic Abuse consists of calculated manipulation, emotional blackmail, tactical identity erosion and systematical brainwash. Narcissistic Abuse is pathological emotional & psychological abuse at the most sophisticated level. The landscape of the brain has literally changed. In simple terms there are parts of the brain that are on high alert and there are other parts that have completely switched off.
On top of that the survivor is dealing with an addiction stronger than heroin. An addiction to the most human need and desire in the world: LOVE.
If you've been exposed to Narcissistic Abuse you may be experiencing complex post-traumatic stress symptoms such as
Overwhelming feeling of hopelessness and emptiness
Intense and difficult to control emotions like Sadness, Anger, Fear, Guilt and Shame
Will I ever feel normal again?
Let me be crystal clear here though:
There is no magic pill that will make all this go away in a blink of an eye.
There are no shortcuts.
You will need to put the work in, there is no way around it. There's no knight in shining armour who will save you - never was, never will be. No-one can fix this but yourself.
Right now you may be struggling with complex post traumatic stress symptoms (and there is a very valid reason why you do!) and I know that it feels like you've reached the end of the road.
But trust me on this. With the right tools and support you will heal and not only survive but thrive.
This journey you are on right now will most likely be the hardest path you'll walk in your life.
Also the most liberating.
How long does the recovery take?
Recovery from Narcissistic Abuse is anything but linear and will often times feel as if you're going backwards rather than move ahead. Keep going, it happens to all of us.
How long your recovery is going to take depends on you and your commitment to your healing. You have to become your number 1 priority.
Having said that, recovery from Narcissistic Abuse doesn't have to be a long and painful road.
With the right tools and support you can turn this around in a matter of months, not years.
The question is:
Are you all in?
How does Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Coaching work?
My approach is different to traditional therapy or counselling and probably like nothing you've experienced before.
For one I come from a place of deep understanding based on my personal experience with the topic. No matter where you are on your recovery journey, rest assured I've been there. I had to put the puzzle pieces together myself to get to where I am today and be able to help you.
That's how I've been able to create a very effective tool box for you, tried and tested both on myself and my one-on-one clients, blending different proven holistic trauma recovery modalities such as hypnosis, neuro-linguistic programming (NLP), Havening Techniques® and Coaching, to get you the best results - fast and most importantly lasting!
I cannot heal you, but what I can do is give you the tools you need to heal yourself!
What you do with them is up to you...
Can I heal while I'm still with the Narcissist?
No Contact is the Number 1 rule of Narcissistic Abuse Recovery. It's a non-negotiable. You are an addict and to be able to heal you have to make the executive decision to cut off your supply.
No contact serves your self-protection.
And if you want to survive this, self-protection needs to become your No. 1 priority. Now.
If you keep connected you will not heal. Period.
Should your narcissist not leave you alone despite you implementing strict no contact and you feel your safety is in danger, please report this to the police and it may be advisable considering to take out a restraining order, if possible.
You might not be able to go full no contact with the narcissist because you have children and share custody, are involved in legal proceedings with the narcissist and are required to interact with them or maybe are in business with them.
In a nut shell, not being able to cut off the narcissist makes the healing more challenging.
Reduce your interactions to an absolute minimum, only what is really necessary. No chit chat, no exchange of pleasantries. Don't give them any energy or attention.
Easier said than done, I know! But solid boundaries are a must.